Choosing a Toy Guide – Dildos

Welcome to the Choosing a Toy Guide series. If you haven’t already done so, we recommend reading Choosing a Toy Guide – The Basics first. It provides general information about all types of toys.  

Dildos can resemble penises, but they don’t have to. Available in all shapes, sizes, colors, materials, and textures, these toys usually don’t vibrate, although a few do have removable (and easily replaceable) bullet vibrators to add another dimension to the toy. Dildos are intended for vaginal and anal play, but some materials are better for one over the other.

Things to consider:

  • Just because a toy can be inserted doesn’t mean it has to be. Lots of pleasure can be had just by moving it across the labia and clitoral area.
  • Thickness can be more important than length. The vagina has a lot of nerve endings in the first 1″ to 2″ but relatively few after that. Some women who want that full feeling can get it with a short but thick toy. For anal play, the toy doesn’t have to be very thick to feel very thick.
  • Length may not always be important . . . but sometimes it is. Some women really enjoy the feeling of something bumping up against their cervix while others find it quite uncomfortable. To reach the prostate, dildos don’t have to be very long, but they do need a curve to hit the sweet spot.
  • Do you like it hard or soft? We mean your toy of course. Glass, metal, and plastic toys are all firm to the touch while silicone, jelly, and rubber feel soft and squishy. Each material has its pros and cons.
  • Smooth, rippled, or with bumps?  Dildos give pleasure from the sensation of being stroked in and out. Some people like a smooth surface while others prefer to feel bumps or ripples on the shaft.
  • Some of these toys also belong in the G-spot category because they have an angled or curved tip. Go to the G-spot page for more information about them.
  • To vibrate or not to vibrate, that is the question. Dildos do not have built-in vibrators (those are found in the Insertable Vibrators section). However some of them do have small bullet vibrators that are removable. If the bullet dies, it can be easily and cheaply replaced.
  • Is that a strap-on, or are you just happy to see me, or both? Some dildos have a flared base that allows them to be used with a harness. If that’s what you’re looking for, we’ve separated them out in our Harness-Compatible Toys section.
  • Gotta love those suction cups! Suction cup bases allow dildos to stick to firm surfaces like wooden chairs, shower stalls, or bathtubs. While many people like controlling a dildo with their hand moving it in and out, others like the dildo to hold still while they move themselves around. Variety is the spice of life.
  • How real is it? Some dildos are made to feel as much like skin as possible, while others don’t look realistic at all. Visual appeal is just as important as how the toy feels. Pick the one that catches your eye.