Let’s be real: dating is insane. It’s a bizarre social ritual rife with awkwardness, mixed signals, emotional turmoil, and these days can be downright dangerous. Throw kink, polyamory, and emotional baggage from previous relationships into the mix, and finding someone compatible can feel impossible. Here’s a few suggestions to help you make a satisfying connection with someone new (or several someones).
Sensual massage is a great way to connect with your partner. It can create an emotional bond and build intimacy for both new and long-term relationships, while also adding to your erotic repertoire. It is important for couples to connect physically without the pressure of climaxing.
Solving the “Problem-Solving” Problem: Problem solving and Sex! About fifteen years ago, the book, “Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus” by John Gray attempted to popularize the concept that males and females were fundamentally different in their communication styles – as fundamentally different as if they were from separate planets. While I contend that both sexes are TRULY from the very same planet, there is a grain of truth that for either sex the role of problem solver is sometimes taken up – to the point of pushing aside all other ways of being involved in the relationship. How do we solve THAT problem?
Many people observe the sadomasochistic side of BDSM with little or no understanding of exactly how it works. Why would someone want to experience pain? Why would someone else feel pleasure by inflicting pain on another person? If I derive pleasure from physically hurting someone else, does that make me a bad person? Very good questions, and there are equally good answers to this often-misunderstood aspect of the BDSM lifestyle.
New Submissives Seeking Play Partners – BE CAREFUL! In a fervor to find like-minded people, newcomers may ignore warning signs and get into potentially dangerous situations. This is a mental state commonly referred to in BDSM circles as “sub-frenzy,” and is a very dangerous state to be in. Learn how to protect yourself as you search for a BDSM play partner.
You probably already know this one: What’s the most important sex organ? Answer: the brain. Turning on a partner is more about exciting the mind than the genitals. So wear something sexy, do some role-playing, or just talk a little dirty.